I call myself a philosophy major because I’m interested in truth and love and life. What they teach here is not truth, love, or life. Just argument about bullshit. All the arguments are based on third person objectivity and reason, and they all end when they reach the edge of the spiritual realm. And people find it so frustrating that all the arguments lead to the same place, and that place can’t be scientifically proven! Oh, the horror! Something exists that we can’t prove and write on a piece of paper and masturbate to!
I love college—or at least I think I do—but I’m alone here. Sometimes I feel great despite that, sometimes I feel lonely. But the fact is, I don’t believe or want the same things as anyone I know. I don’t even expect anyone to believe or want the same things as I do. My solar plexus chakra feels like a perpetual mess of gurgly shit because I sit in class and listen to these pointless arguments without standing up and primal screaming “THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN THINKING, ASSHOLES!!”
All this while surrounded by hot girls.
There are so many ways I could handle this:
1) Do lots of heart meditations
2) Follow “The Master Key System” religiously
3) Do lots of 5DC
4) Always be aware of my body and my awareness
5) Trust the shit out of the universe
6) Do ridiculous crap to push through fears
7) Meditate much more than I do (half hour to an hour per day)
8 ) Relax, everything’s perfect, remember?
The advice overlaps! Sometimes I’ll decide one and then forget about it 20 minutes later and decide another. Perhaps I should try each one for a week straight, get out of this “jack of all trades, master of none” pattern.
Thanks for reading. I love you guys.
–Mike
***EDIT: I just imagined what it’d be like to drop out. I’d be at home for a while working my ass off at a job (which I’d take joy in, because I’m on my mission and being true to myself–I know this feeling because I’ve had a job before, and that was before I even knew what being true to myself was) until I made enough money to move to a cheaper part of the state/country/world where I could make more money and save up enough to have a little breathing room. Meanwhile I’d have my own place, maybe I’d find a girlfriend to aid in my mission, maybe I’d become more sure about my mission. It just seems like I’d be much happier this way, almost instantly. But my family pretty much bred me to go to college. Could dropping out be the first big heap of shit I have to wade through in service to my higher purpose?
***ANOTHER EDIT: I got some pretty good advice on the iG forums, so don’t freak out and call my parents. I’m not gonna drop out. 
November 7, 2007 at 9:26 pm
hey man, it’s Greg; only a handful of people in this world have the heart to be honest with themselves and aware of their situation. You truly developed a strong sense of that as I got to know you. Your philosophy class reminds me greatly of my psychology class; simply all mental based, with no understanding of spirituality. Just a “wrong” and a “right”. It’s a no wonder people are conditioned the way they are, from the beginnings of our lives we are fed our “education”, our mental conditioning given to us by our parents and our society. Love is often lost in such a mind- based reality, but people like us allow it to grow and spread around the world, which is love’s true destiny. I’m truly looking forward to seeing and talking to you again this thanksgiving break!
peace and love my bro for life.
Greg
November 11, 2007 at 9:25 am
That last one, “Relax, everything’s perfect remember?” is really all you need to believe. Think about it – If you could ‘believe’ that everything is exactly as it should be with total certainty, what else would you need to think or do?
From that ‘belief’ you realize that whatever you think or do is fine. Thank God, we can finally relax!
The problem is that the mind (which is not really you, by the way, you just ‘think’ it is), which was conceived out of perfect ‘awareness’, inserts into awareness all this ’stuff,’ which then muddies up the perfection that is ‘awareness’. It is this ’stuff’ which tells us that there are things that we must do to try to reach perfection, because obviously (or so it seems) we’re not there yet
But wait, how can that be since perfection is certain!
Great site!
November 17, 2007 at 1:01 am
Greetings.
Stop and consider what the teacher/professor was looking for. Were they looking for independent thought? Were they looking for parroting?
My son took philosophy and the teach game him a ‘D’. Teach was looking for recital of definitions and my son, bothered to understand the perspectives of the philopsohies, themselves.
I told my son not to be bothered by it. Don’t you, either. Maybe you’re the one that’s going to break the ground, who knows?
December 1, 2007 at 8:10 pm
[...] In case all that doesn’t open your eyes, look at the difference between your comment and the one my friend Greg anonymously posted. [...]